Middle-age is a crucial period and middle-aged women are facing even more dangers. Youth is still lingering on there, but it can't stand any carelessness or negligence. Staying youth can be likened to climbing a steep hill, while negligence will lead to decrepitude overnight. Those who feed on their youth will have to opt otherwise at this stage.
This is a time full of temptations, alluring girls and glamourous women pop up everywhere, making the discomposed men confused and disoriented, leaving behind more and more broken-up families and abandoned wives, thereby leading the middle-aged to the heartfelt realization that women cannot afford to grow old.
Beauty parlors are being opened one after another and the cosmetics market is getting more and more prosperous in order to keep the youthful face of women forever fresh.. Proper facial care, hair-dressing or aerobics are all necessary for women, but they are only superficial and can not last long. They can in no way do the cosmetic make-ups round-the-clock.. What will become of them after removing the cosmetics from their face?
Women need to refine their mind and to make themselves more intellectually prepared 。 They need the sense of security too. We may well say that men's youth lies in their career while women's youth relies on their state of mind and cultivation Because of the rise of Yin and the decline of Yang, we can see many capable women devising and calculating with all their might. They used to be very beautiful, and are now still charming, but they are middle-aged after all. How long can they still preserve their diminishing youth?
What are those women after? Money? But will they be happy if they have to count the money with their skinny shriveled hands after they have successfully become wealthy old ladies?
Maybe they are seeking for spacious houses and limousines. But these are just tools to serve us, just like a motorcycle is for us to ride on, not for us to carry on our shoulders. Is it still worth the price if their pursuit has become a burden or a pressure that calls for the sacrifice of their youth?
Or maybe they need the money for their children to study abroad. But studying abroad is not the ambition of everyone. As we always say that children have their own luck, we shouldn't choose the same way for them to grow up. Doing business or going in for politics, working at civilian posts or as military officials are different choices for different children. Some even want to become chess players and it is such a wonderful career that after becoming successful, they can make playing chess a rewarding profession.. Why should we try our best to send our children abroad where there are so many uncertainties? What's the point of the sacrifice of our precious youth to send our children to somewhere that may be heaven, or hell?
We should be moderate at seeking wealth, for there is no limit for it. A billionaire eats no more than three meals a day and sleeps in one bed at night while a family living on a meager salary can be very happy and healthy. We may feel sometimes that the luxurious Beijing Roast Duck is no more delicious than the simple pancakes with shallots. Only when they keep a peaceful heart can they face both favors and humiliations with composure.
What do the middle-aged women need in order to maintain their youth and doomed decrepitude? Fine qualities and good manners, confidence and calmness. Don't do too much extra work, don't tire yourselves out, and never try anything beyond your capacity and energy.
What's more, they need security and friendship. No matter how strong a man is, he needs support; no matter how independent a woman is, she needs backing. The flowery girls may care about nothing but amusement, and they may not consider even the reliability and capability of a man. Middle-aged women, however, are much more practical, and they have to face the loyalty and creativity of a man. What they are seeking is the most loyal, the most responsible, the most powerful, the most reliable and the most trustworthy love which is nearly eternal and unchangeable. Any kind of strike may wear away their youth which is once gone never to return.
Middle-aged women must keep a clear head instead of doing things out of willfulness. They should be able to judge who is sincere and who is hypocritical. Once they choose the hypocritical instead of the sincere out of carelessness, tragedy will definitely fall on them. In fact, one whim may decide whether they will live in heaven or stay in hell.
All women have one weak point—they are easily enchanted by men's flattery. There're numerous sweet-tongued men, but loyal ones are hard to find. They may use sweet words to flatter you or they may be soft-spoken and submissive, but that is when they are weak and in need of help. As soon as the situation is different, they may change immediately. We always think the weak is the reliable, but this is misleading. The weak may be pitiable, but not always reliable. Reliability doesn't mean being weak or strong, but depends on whether one can master himself. If someone, when absent from home, does what he dares not do at home, then how can he be regarded as a trustworthy man?
The middle-aged women, with the exception of those who work at special posts, needn't fight too hard. Instead, they should encourage men to temper themselves in this world. Studying with ease, working with ease, living with ease and facing everything with ease are what middle-aged women should try to do. Ease is the symbol of ever-lasting youth and also the glamour of all middle-aged women.
May all kindhearted women enjoy an easy life and ever-lasting youth!
Translated by Zhang Baodan
June 20, 2004
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